With Strangelove, depeche mode has its 19th top 30 hit in England. You would think Dave being full of joy. One big uncertainty however overshadows Dave's succes : for 14 years now he's hoplessly searching for his dad...

Everytime when Depeche Mode appears in the Brittish 'Top Of The Pops'-program, Dave Gahan hopes his father Len is watching it somewhere. "Does my father hear our hits, that question keeps buggin me", says the 25 year old Dave. "I would do anything to meet him one more time. I never knew him and my mother Sylvia doesn't want to talk about her ex-husband. I respect that and don't force her doing so. She probably thinks I hate Len for what he did to us, but how can you hate someone you don't even know ?"

Len Gahan left his wife, Dave and his two sisters when Dave was only 3 years old. Sylvia remarried shortly after that and Dave and his sisters quickly accepted 'that stranger' as their stephfather. They were very unfortunate, because their 'second dad' died when Dave was only 9.

"I'll never forget that day - I was 10 - that, when I came home from school, there was this stranger in my mom's house. My mother introduced him to me as my real dad. I remember I said, crying, that was impossible because my father was dead. How was I supposed to know that man lived with us until I was 3".

"From that day on, Len often visited the house", Dave continues, "until one year later, he disapeared again, forever this time. Since then he gave no sign of life anymore. By growing older I thought about him more and more. The only thing my mother wanted to say, was that he moved out to Jersey to open a hotel".

The memories faded when Dave turned into a successfull singer in Depeche Mode, with the age of 18. He lives together with his wife Jo in Essex now, only a few miles away from his mother's house. In september they're expecting their first baby. That fact brought the memories of his father back...

"Becoming a dad is, I think, the most divine thing for anyone", smiles Dave, "I only question myself if someone who never knew his own father can become a good father. I wish I could discuss this with Len...."